My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

my daughter goes to her grandma's every saturday from 10am -2 while im working . well shes been tell hubby and i that the kids needed a hair cut and hubby told her not to think about it that they were fine.

well here it is saturday a day after he told her this and they picked me up form work and my daughters hair was cut.

You would no believe how angry i was . I got home and let it dwindle but its not working i called my hubby and he was no help how do i deal with this ?

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

Find a babysitter for your daughter when you work, and tell grandma she doesn't see the kid until she can respect your wishes as the child's mother. It was not her place to have the child's hair cut. Stick to your guns on this one, or this woman will run over your life. Good luck.

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

let the hair grow out , or you could say something and make your life a living hell . welcome to marriage , it takes a lot of patience

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

Sneak into her house at night and cut her hair.

Wait a few days until you cool down. Then call your MIL and tell her that you're upset. She may have thought she was doing you a favor.

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

Just flat out tell her you do not appreciate the fact that she decided to do that after being told not to.

You don't have to be mean about it, but you can convey how serious of a issue it is with you that she went ahead and did that anyway.

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

just tell her if she cant abide your rules on ur kids then she doesnt need to spend time with him these are her grandkids they are not her kids she needs to know where she stands with u and ur husband until she can abide ur rules then grandma doesnt need to see her

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

Well, you could chill out, realize that it's just hair and grows back, and be thankful for the free babysitting your MIL is providing, or you could put your daughter in daycare.

Aren't there worse things to worry about? It's not like your daughter was sexually molested or physically abused.

I'm sorry if this seemed so nasty. My kids grew up with no grandparents. I just think any kids that have grandparents are lucky.

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

Tell her how upset you are and that she needs to respect the fact that you are the mom, not her. If she can't do that, I would find another babysitter if possible, because she probably isn't respecting other things about you, either. Other than that, I don't know if there's not much you can do for restitution. Just stand up for your rights.

Well, maybe have her pay out of her pocket to have you daughter's hair cut and styled exactly how you (and maybe your daughter, depending on how you feel) would like it cut.

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

put some nare (hair removal) in her shampoo bottle.that will fix her a$$ !! i would be mad to.some mother in laws don't know how to mind there own buisness.

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

Sounds like the same problem i had with my sons grandma he also went to his dad's house (he lived with his parents) and they would cut all his hair off i was sooo mad! Even after i asked them not too. So what i did was .... i told her not to do it again and that what she had done was unacceptable. Even after all that, they still kept cutting his hair. So i finally gave up on telling them not to and i never sent him there nedding a cut. The day he needed to go there i would always take him for a hair cut. It's too bad that grandparents don't listen, and that there isn't much we can do without screwing ourselves. If i wasn't much help.. i'm sorry.

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

You and your husband get jobs at least 600 miles from you MIL and move. Then you'll not have to worry about her manipulations and other control issues. You'll have to pay for child care then, but if they do something so insensitive you can fire them and get someone else.

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

You said that she's been telling you and your husband that they needed a haircut and you said that your husband told her not to think about it? What did you tell her when it was brought up beforehand?

Why are you so angry? Do you not like the style? Hair grows. Don't let it eat at you. Life is short enough.

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

NOW you can cut your mother-in-law's hair .TIT FOR TAT.

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

well you kinda have to let it grow out but i also think you have to tell your mother-inlaw that she is your daughter and that you odnt appreciate her underminding you just lat her know you really dont appreiciate her doing something you spicificly told her not to and i would tell her that if she wishes to contiune undermionding you that you'll find somebody else to watch the kids while yoru working on saterdays

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

Tell her that you were growing it out and that she should not have cut it that she is not the child's parent and should consider your feelings in such matters in the future. and if your really bold tell her that if something like this happens again that you will find another sitter and that she will not be left with the child until you feel you can trust her to abide by your wishes i would make your husband be a part of this he may not like it but if you do nothing it will continue and if you do it alone you will be the bad person.

Just remind her that you are the parents and she is the grandmother and reassure her that her role in the children's lives is important but not no maters such as these

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

I'd be furious. My mother does similar things. It's a sign of disrespect, and an effort to show control on her part. I agree with the people above. Let yourself cool down, and then talk to her in a polite, but firm manner. Actually, you should explain this to your husband first, and determine whether he is going to support you on this. If not, realize, MIL may purposely be trying to drive a wedge in between the two of you (she misses his undivided attention). If this is the case, you have to decide if it's a battle worth fighting; a potential battle for your husband's affection/attention. I can sympathize and wish you the best of results.

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

I know your mad, I have a 5 year old and her hair reaches her ...butt..beautiful thick curly hair..i would be devastated.....i would confront her and tell her and your husband how disappointed you are...and i would get another babysitter just to show mother in law ...that you really mean business and are very upset about her hair being cut...find another babysitter..

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

There's a lot going on here. Communication between your husband and his mother. How did she perceive his attempt to reject her attempt at helping.

I agree with a lot of the above posts, but I'd check out the perception of the grandma before I talked to her. Affirm her desire to help, thank her for the help she gives that you do appreciate. Let her know that cutting the hair is a decision you'd like to make in your family instead of her making it for you.

A lot depends on how she reacts to that, if she's fine then you can set a time to go over and discuss the kinds of decisions she can make and the decisions you'd like to reserve for your family to make.

If she reacts badly, you have to decide if it is time to find a different sitter.

Remember you can't change her or how she treats your family. You can only express your feelings and decide what you are going to do about how she behaves.

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

I had a some what similar situation with my daughter and my in laws. The worst thing was that they allowed my daughter to cut her own hair. I was sooooo mad because of the fact that she was only 2 years old at the time and because I never wanted her hair cut in the first place and my in laws knew exactly how I felt about cutting her hair. I guess they figured since they didn't do it I wasn't going to get mad. Boy were they wrong I told them off that same day. I told them they need to respect my wish with my children and let me raise them the way I want too. I love my in laws very much and we are very close but that really made me upset. But eventually we did get over it. But now they always ask me before they take any of my kids to the hair salon or they even ask if I want to come along.

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

AAAggghhh!!!!! I had this happen too!! My mother in law kept commenting on my sons hair-- that it needed to be cut, and I thought it was fine. (I wanted it longer since he had a little curl to it.... etc.) I specifically told her not to touch it.

Well, I picked him up after a visit, and low-and behold--- he had a haircut. AND A BAD ONE!!!! I was livid....SO so so mad, and i couldn't figure it out. I got into a huge battle with her over it. she thought I was over reacting, and I realized what made me so mad was that deep down, all mothers question themselves. We don't get a manual, so we make all the best decisions we can. But then when someone steps over that parenting boundary in ANY way with our kids, look out!! Instant hurt- instant defenses!! I remember screaming at her that this was my son, and not hers!!!

Well, no duh!

I realized that I did over react. Hair grows back, over and over. It took awhile to get over that one ( I was a young mom) but now I have pictures of that time in my son's little life, and I really mock out his grandmother for the bad haircut. She laughs about it now too, and admits that she was wrong....and that it was a horrible 'do!

Thing is, they are YOUR kids. Don't worry about it-- no one can step on that. But Grandma thinks that she knows best. And actually, if you married her son, then she must have done something right. Cut her some slack--- she knows deep down that she shouldn;t have done it, and will probably feel bad if you tell her how much it hurt you (and you should definitely tell her!!!!)..... just be nice, and don't expect an apology for a few years!!!

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

Tell her that you might have to find a babysitter if she can't do what you ask.She probably thought she was doing you a favor.

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

I can certainly understand why you are so upset, espicially since she was specifically asked not to do this! I would wait a bit and calm down some, and then have a talk with her. Get it politely across to her that while you are very thankful for all her help and concern, there a some decisions that you feel should be made only by the childs parents, and hair cuts are one of them. She may get upset, buy as long as you are as polite and calm as can be, then oh well, it's a just a haircut now, but later down the road will she decide to make a more serious decision for you?

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

Did she cut it herself? Or did she take them to a professional. Does it look nice? Do your daughters like their hair? If it looks nice and your daughters like it .. say thank you ,if not... tell her how you really feel, in a nice way of course ,She feels she is just being helpful and probably doesn't know she's offended you. Remember take a deep breath and stay calm. I have a mother-in-law Too! I know how you feel..

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

Do not let her go back over there. tell your mother in law that if she cant respect your wishes then she isn't going to be aloud to be alone with the children. good luck

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

Definately say something. I had this happen and I firmly told her that my daughter was my responsibility and to obey my wishes or she would not be alone with her again. Sounds harsh but she caught on quickly :0)

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

First inform your MIL how upset you are that she went against your wishes. If she keeps defending what she does I suggest finding someone else to watch your child.

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

I'd sneak over to her house and shave her bald.

No, seriously, though. I'd make it very clear to her that she ignored you and your husband so she doesn't get to see the children anymore. If she's going to ignore your requests about not cutting the children's hair - what else is she going to ignore you about?

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

Go like this "See I ask u not to and u still did well I have to tell u something that iz ur son and this iz my daughter so next time u want to to cut someones hair do ur child and they SHOULD BE BY BIRTH! ok n have a nice day

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

i can understand that you are feline so mad at what happened.

the disrespect for you and your express wishes as a parent (and your child is YOUR responsibility not her grandparents)

one tack is to put your child in paid care for the hours you are working for a few weeks - your in laws may get the hint after a while.

or you could be about 3 hours late in picking her up from their house - see how THEY like being disrespected and having boundaries violated

or you could have a word with your mil in front of your hubby (and shame on HIM for not sticking up for you - did he REALLY tell his mother (and tell her strongly and unambiguously enough) or did he merely SAY he told her not to do it?)

even if she thought she was doing you all a favour what she really did was to violate the boundaries of grandparent-ism with you as a parent

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

Wow, she has a alot of nerve. I would just explain to her that they are YOUR kids not HERS and she needs to let you make the decisions about them. It was not her place to cut her hair and I would be really mad if my mother in law did that too. Talk to her and tell her how you feel. If you let this go it could be getting her ears pierced or something like that next time!!

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

Cut your mother in law's time with your child...give HER a time out..bet she'll never go against your wishes again.

My mother in law cut my daughters hair after being asked not to how do i deal with this?

Well I would be finding a new sitter and banishing Gramma from seeing the child for a little while and then she is only allowed to see the child in your presence. Never alone.

I know that if my Mother-in-law did this against my wishes, I would be totally pissed off about it ~ and my husband would definately know my true feelings. Then I would give my Mother-in-law an earful to boot.

That is disrespectful and unacceptable behaviour by your Mother-in-law. The fact that the hair will grow back is besides the point ~ it was against your wishes and those need to be respected.